Episode 33: My updated model of self-regulation

Hello, hello, everyone!  Welcome to another episode of the Teaching and Raising Problem Solvers podcast.

You’ll hear me typing on my keyboard for just a second because I’m actually pulling up a model of communicative competence that I’m going to tie into today’s episode.  

So, when I think about self-regulation, I have put together a model for self-regulation that I want to just briefly cover today.  I’ll try and dive into each of those aspects again a little bit more over the next couple of weeks.

So just to bring this back to the home base, self-regulation is the ability to be aware of and modulate – very important first two steps – be aware of and modulate (modulate meaning to change) your thoughts and emotions or energy states to accomplish a goal, in spite of obstacles that may pop up.

So, the typical trajectory of self-regulation is you encounter a situation or an experience; you have a thought that drives a feeling that drives an action.  One of the most important first steps, as I’ve talked about in previous recent episodes, is that ability to be aware of your thoughts and emotions or energy states because oftentimes when we’re looking to change our self-regulation or to positively drive our self-regulation, that first step of being aware of our thoughts and emotions or energy states is the place we need to start.  

But one of the things I’ve been thinking a lot about is my model of self-regulation, which historically I’ve tied together of the five aspects of: your sense of self (your positive, affirming sense of self); your sensory processing (your sensory systems – how are they bringing in information and how is your brain processing it); your social communication skills; your executive function skills; and your co-regulation experiences.

I’ve kind of said that the combination of those five things leads to ultimately what comes out as your self-regulation profile.  So your sensory processing needs will affect how you regulate – if something is really bothering  your sensory system, it can adversely impact your self-regulation skills.  For example, if auditory input really bothers you.  I’ll give the example – one thing I’ve noticed recently: I have two kids who are pretty young and they are happy, joyful, chatty kids.  And I’ve recognized, as somebody who grew up as an only child (that’s me), [as somebody who grew up as an only child], I had a lot of down time, of quiet, in my childhood, and that was what I was used to.  So coming into motherhood and now being in a season where my kids are very active, very chatty, I found myself becoming frequently what I would call “dysregulated,” or kind of agitated, and it took some investigation into why.  What I found for me was that the consistent auditory input of my kids talking, laughing – which are beautiful things that I wouldn’t trade for the world – my brain needed some time to have more quiet.  So I’ve actually been weaving in using my Bose noise-canceling headphones more, and I’ve noticed a significant difference in how my body and brain are responding.  

So it’s just an important note that the self-regulation, that overall skill that we kind of boil down to being aware of your thoughts, emotions and energy states to drive a goal, is driven by many facets, like your sensory processing needs.  So that’s why I like to just include all those pinnacles not just for kids, but for ourselves.  Because if we are frequently becoming agitated, dysregulated, frustrated, if we find ourselves chronically yelling, usually there are aspects of our self-regulation profile that are driving that.

Let me tell you about Janice Light’s model of communicative competence.  In 1989, Janice Light proposed this definition of communicative competence.  She proposed that there are a bunch of factors that play into how competent a communicator is.  Those four ones being: linguistic competence, social competence, strategic competence, and operational competence.  But in the middle was the co-construction, meaning the communication partner’s profile.  All those other pieces I just mentioned were parts about the person, or parts about the person’s abilities or skills.  But in the middle of all that was: how are the adults around them co-constructing experiences for that communicator to be successful?

And I thought, “oh my goodness!”  I’ve been around this model for a while, you guys.  I’ve been around this model for years.  I do evaluations where we talk about this model.  And finally it clicked for me that my model of self-regulation, or regulation competence, is similar to this. 

What I’ve kind of reconfigured it to be – and you’ll see if you follow me on Instagram, you’ll see I’ll post a model of this today – is that all the things that are about the individual (the individual’s sense of self, the individual’s sensory processing, the individual’s social communication skills, the individual’s executive function skills), those are variable, dependent on the individual.  In the middle of all that, what really pulls all those together and really enhances and ties into all those, are a child’s co-regulation experiences.  Remember, co-regulation experiences are providing warm, responsive relationships [warm, responsive, attuned relationships] structuring the environment to not only buffer stress but to also provide rich opportunities for practicing self-regulation skills, and also teaching, coaching, and modeling self-regulation skills.  And that those co-regulation experiences tie into a child’s sense of self–their sensory processing, their executive function skills, their social communication skills–so that we’re teaching, coaching, and modeling around all of those areas.

You’ll notice in the background, too, I have added systemic inequities.  I think it’s really important to also acknowledge the impact that racism and ableism play into a child’s self-regulation skills and play into the dynamics of developing self-regulation.

I hope you enjoyed the updated model.  I’ll be sure to drive into it a little bit more, but I’m trying to keep these episodes nice and short, and I need to go and drink some water, too!  

I hope you have a fantastic day, and I will talk to you all very, very soon.